Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Dog vs. Children

I know what you must be thinking: "two blogs in one day? lisa must be drinking"
and you're right. Inspiration comes to us from lots of different places. My inspirational place just happens to be halfway down a bottle of wine.

At any rate...
When we got our former dog Jax (we gave him back. My house is crazy enough without adding a dog to the mix) I learned something I never knew before. Dog people are AWESOME. They're always active, out walking or running. They are out first thing in the morning, after work and usually again after dinner.  Dude- if I worked my kids like dog people work their dogs my kids would be in bed at 7 EVERY NIGHT (possibly earlier).

So something I noticed when we had the dog... dog people are really friendly. You don't feel any hesitation in meeting the owner of the dog whose ass your dog is sniffing. You just look at the owner and do that "how's it?" nod. They'll strike up a conversation with you, talk about how cute your dog is, ask about his breed and his age. You share tips and tricks and advice.  These people are genuinely interested in your dog. All the while you guys are watching this butt sniffing marathon go on and act like it's nothing. In what other circumstance can you do that?? They are always SO very nice. I mean yeah you get the occasional weirdo who is waaaaay too into their dog but whatever. Think of it as entertainment.

Unfortunately we had to get rid of the dog citing irreconcilable differences. It just wasn't meant to be. But what I miss most are the dog owners. Because quite frankly, child owners are bitches.

What the hell? We're all moms, none of us have many friends, we all miss our size 2 days, we're all wiping asses on a daily basis, we all crave the same female companionship, so what gives? You start asking a mom the age and breed of her child but then she'll snap at you that her child is adopted and snatches the child away. Dog owners are so much more open and willing to talk about the adoption.  Mom's should be too.  Obviously we have more than enough free time on our hands since we're all here at the park trying to kill time until we need to go home and make dinner. I bet if I popped a bottle of wine that would gain their interest. (Coincidentally while I typed "popped" I accidentally typed "pooped"... but even still that would garner just as much attention, and weed out the weak.  I would have friends for life!!)

I guess it's just as well because if we talk to the mommy then we'll have to exchange info and start playdating. At least with a dog you can end it by saying "well, see you around!"

So until the next time, I'll see you around!

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