Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Murphy's Laws: with kids

Murphy's Laws:
(when you have kids)

  1. Clean sheets = spontaneous bed wetting
  2. Fresh mopped floor = oil spill (true story, but no evidence. From The Divine Secrets of a Domestic Diva.)
  3. Favorite food bought in bulk = sudden disinterest in favorite food
  4. New clothes = growth spurt
  5. Bedtime routine perfected = day light savings 
  6. Mother with a hangover = classmates birthday party
  7. Brand new toy =  packaging is more fun
  8. Babysitter = good behavior 
  9. New phone = tub of water
  10. On time to school = forgot homework at home
  11. Brand new dishes = child breaks one
  12. First day of new job = child gets flu (I highly recommend Little White Lion's article)
  13. 2 hours spent on a lovely meal = they want hot dogs
  14. Unexpected check in the mail = tire blows out
  15. Second day of diet = you are volunteered to make 3 dozen cupcakes
  16. Finally get around to cutting that melon = it's gone bad
  17. Clean white shirt = meets child's marker (when will we learn that we can only wear the color black when we have children??)
  18. Empty tank of gas = emergency carpool leader
  19. Expensive wine = knocked over on floor
  20. They finally like grilled cheese sandwiches = just not at a restaurant after you've already ordered it. 
  21. "I want ice cream" = "I didn't want chocolate ice cream!"
  22. You shower, shave, dab some perfume, climb into bed.... = child has nightmare, needs to sleep with you. 


  1. Love it! And so true, especially number 8!

  2. Ain't this the truth!!! #21 happens to me all of the time with various foods. UGH!

  3. Notorious for #16. E.V.E.R.Y.T.I.M.E!!!!!!

  4. #10. It just makes me cry to see it. Usually when I have a meeting somewhere that it will make me late for when I go home and get the homework :(

  5. #3 - nothing kills a fav food like having it on hand.

  6. Wow, can relate to so many. #16 why is it so hard to get around to cutting a melon? havent figured that out yet but it is.

  7. Love this, so glad I found you, we don't even own white shirts anymore! Besides, isn't white virginal? Having kids, I know I'm not that anymore, lol

  8. I enjoyed this list. This is funny and real at the same time. Nice read. Nice blog.

  9. #23. You finally get to your plate of hot food=they have too poop which means you have to go wipe...
    Happens EVERY TIME