Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Product Distraction *updated*

Wow, has it really been 3 days since I blogged? Holy cow. Well I've got lots of things cookin' over here. I'll tell you about it, just not today.

I woke up at 3am this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. Funny the things that run through your mind when you're trying to lull yourself back to sleep. Something made me think about preparation H and it's effectiveness at getting rid of puffy eyes. Then that made me think about if that would be an embarrassing thing to buy or not. So long story short I've come up with some ideas to avoid the embarrassment of buying certain products. Because let's face it, we still get a little uncomfortable when we plop down our tampax on the conveyor belt.

1. Tampon/pads
Purchase with red wine, brownies from the bakery, and a copy of The Notebook.
2. Preparation H
Purchase alongside concealer, powder, makeup sponges and kleenex
3. Lube
Purchase with  Geritol, a 40th birthday card, and a magnifying glass. Giant print crossword puzzle book optional.
4. Condoms
Purchase with a plastic rain poncho.
5. Douche
Purchase with a gift bag (same size as douche), tissue paper and a bow. Birthday card optional.
6. Enema
Purchase with water balloons.

Am I missing anything?

I just thought of another good one for tampons. Buy them with black gloves, a rope, duct tape, and large garbage bags.


  1. Awesome! I bought some feminine products at Target the week. The teenage boy checking me couldn't look me in the eye. :)

  2. Hysterical! Going to have to try these tips next time.

  3. Spectacular! I can't decide which is my fave: #4 or #5!

  4. Lmao! Been married for 12 yrs... Haven't bought tampons, pads, yeast infection meds in 12 yrs... I need to give more head!