Friday, April 8, 2011

How to wear Yoga pants

I realize that Yoga Pants (YP) are a hot commodity among mothers these days. (and hot college girls with high and tight buns) They have become a staple in my wardrobe for sure.
They're soft, stretchy and the waist band doubles as a girdle. You can wear 'em around the house, to run errands, to work out and even to (shock) do yoga.

I know I live the better part of my day in workout clothes. Mostly because I workout. (I do not, however wear them when i'm not working out. Unless I'm bloated. Or my good clothes are dirty. Or I think I might end up working out if I can squeeze it in.)  But if you are one of the lucky few who doesn't need to work out (bitch) and you still wear YP, here are some helpful hints so the rest of the workout world doesn't want to CUT YOU.

Tip #1: DO NOT under ANY circumstances tell me you DON'T workout. because i WILL cut you on the spot. Lie to me if you have to. Honesty is not the best policy. Tell me you workout 3 hours a day to maintain your perfect figure. (I don't workout 3 times a day because I like to maintain a curvy figure, suck on that skinny bitches)

Tip #2: If you wear YP pair them with flip flops (yoga is done barefoot) or with worn in sneakers (so at least it APPEARS you have been doing some sort of activity that does not require a shopping cart)

Tip #3: Do not style your hair or wear makeup if you have on YP. Unless you're one of THOSE women who works out with a full face of makeup. In that case... whatever. Everyone knows you're a phony anyway.

Tip #4: I encourage you to at least TRY a yoga class. You will learn some lingo, and you will even feel justified owning 9 pairs of YP. Who knows, you may even want to try another class... after all... you have the wardrobe.

Now let's face it: YP are a 1/2 yard of fabric away from being leggings. There is such a thing as overkill. So exercise your YP wearing days with caution. Maybe alternate with jeans. Or actual leggings.

 I love my YP mostly because they love me back. I have 5 pairs of jeans that don't afford me that luxury. And don't forget, if you use YP for their intended purpose... you will probably fall in love with jeans all over again.


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