Schick Quatro

My 6 year old drew this picture. It is me. I had no idea my 5 o'clock shadow was so prominent. Then again, I don't walk around staring into a mirror all day to monitor it so how would I know? I'm also hittin' the bottle around 5 o'clock so my vision is slightly skewed.

Look, I'm not going to lie to you... I have chin hairs ok? Apparently it's hereditary. And surprisingly enough I didn't inherit it from my Italian side. Although that probably didn't help matters very much.
But honestly? I don't have THAT many. Sure I have some, and sure sometimes (ok all the time) it looks like I have tiny blackheads all over my chin. But come on, a mustache too?? This kid pays way too close attention for my comfort levels.

monday

~Sorry, I couldn't think of a better title for this post.~
Just an update: had guests this weekend so that's why the lack of posts.

Did "chores" with my husband today. it mainly consisted of me sitting around his office courtyard watching him do stuff. Oh, I helped him plant a tree, then watched him plant the other two.  Very hard work. I did ride my bike in circles in the parking lot. I might have broken a sweat. Don't be a hater. You don't need to be jealous of me because i'm having the holiday weekend of a lifetime. Just suck it up. All good things come to those who wait.

We will be watching the History Channel on Netlix to celebrate today,
Memorial Day. Oh and I'll be drinking. How else would it be a
"celebrating"?

Looking forward to tomorrow for two reasons:

1) my daughters last day of preschool

• It is bad because, well, it is the LAST day of school. Meaning no more school. No more quiet Tuesdays and Thursdays
• It is good because that's $$$ back in my pocket. And I like $$$ in my pocket. It pads my ass. 

<~~~~~~~ Like so

2) I have the CUTEST thing EVAH that i'm doing for her class. I can't wait to brag share it with you. I've been known to get crafty and creative from time to time. 

So there you have it. Just trying to drink my way through Monday so I can get to Tuesday. 

Look how easy i'm making it for you to VOTE.

   

Lookin' for a good read?

I love reading Lola. She's hilarious. She doesn't get enough credit. (actually, maybe she does. How would I know?) Unfortunately she has her voting button AT THE BOTTOM OF HER PAGE. Silly Lola. She can be hard to find. She needs to be higher ranking than me! She's THAT funny. She is absolutely fearless in her writing. She isn't afraid to "go there". And she might even make you pee in your pants a little. Or she might totally offend you. (Which is one of the reasons she's so funny. In my opinion)

So here she is. check her out. give her some love. vote for her even! if you can find her voting button.... at the bottom of the page.

Here's  a post that had me rolling. Dairy Queen Walk of Shame.
Your welcome dear reader.

Word of the Day

TASTY

[tey-stee]

-adj

1) having a pleasant flavor. This cosmo sure is tasty, I can't even taste the alcohol!
2) attractive. John Hamm is so tasty.

*side note- if you look at the word "tasty" and repeat it enough times... you begin to think it should be pronounced "tasss-tee", and then it sounds dirty.
**double side note- does this picture make him look like Hugh Jackman? They could be brothers right? Hot brothers. Maybe hot, ass kicking, advertiser brothers? John would be the cool as a cucumber one, and Hugh would be the rogue brother who is angry about something we don't know yet but we'll find out in the prequel. Hugh wants to use his brawn while John uses his brain and his powers of seduction. Together they fight the forces of big corporations and evil tyrants. No wait, that's the same thing... Anyway they are hot, shirtless (hugh) suited (john) and fight in the name of Good.  Are you listening to this Hollywood?? Movie GOLD. Your welcome.

Have you voted today?

It's as easy as ONE click. 

=)

will blog for votes!!

And......?

The child mentioned a check.........?

The Breakup

Dear Blogger,

We've been together for a little over a year. You were there when I needed to share exciting news, when I needed a shoulder to cry on, and when I needed to brag about my awesome adventures/children/surgeries. So it brings me much pain to have to say this to you.

I think we should break up. It is not me, it is you. You've been very flakey lately, losing my information and forgetting things. I need a blog host who is more dependable, more reliable.

Look, it's not that I don't like you anymore, I do. I just don't think you are meeting my needs anymore. When I told you that it didn't bother me that you wouldn't let me reply to my readers comments.... it was true. But now things are different. I need to connect with my readers on a deeper level. I feel like you are standing in the way. I don't want to be in a controlling relationship.

I'm not going to lie, I've been looking at other hosts. I even bought a domain. It has a gorgeous view. I haven't moved in yet, but I knew the time would be soon at hand that I would need to pack my bags and go.

I'm sure this is not going to be an easy transition. It will be especially hard for me. I know you'll find someone new. Someone who loves you just the way you are. We've just grown apart. I'm sure we'll remain friends. We have many of the same friends so I know I'll see you around, pretty much on a daily basis I'm sure. I don't want there to be any awkwardness. *shake hands*   Thanks for understanding, Blogger.

Your pal,
Lisa

UPDATE:  the new domain will be www.thehomeceomom.com
right now it forwards it to this site.

Word of the Day

Exercise

[ek-ser-sahyz]
noun, verb, -cised, -cis·ing.


noun

1.  bodily or mental exertion, especially for the sake of training or improvement of health:
     Somebody told me that if I exercise I can lose weight, and then I ate another donut.

2.  something done or performed as a means of practice or training:
     exercises for the violin make my ears bleed.

3.  a putting into action, use, operation, or effect:
     I told my children to exercise caution while sharpening my knives.

Miss Pants

So everyday I drive my kid to school I see this mom. It's easy to spot her for 2 reasons.
1) We're always late so there isn't anyone else around.
2) She has the hottest little body ever. We're talking MILF material.

So I dubbed her "Miss Pants" with her perky butt, and thinness, and hotness, and high heels, and blonde hair, and hotness! So naturally I hate her. And it's so unflashy. She doesn't go walking around like she's totally hot, which makes me hate her more. It's so effortless for her! (or so I think. Ignorance is bliss after all) Seriously, you should see the butt on this woman. I would die for that butt.

Anywho....
I saw Miss Pants leaving the school one day as I was coming up to it. I finally stopped her. I had to know if she was a total bitch or not.

Me: "Hi, so ok, I have to tell you something"
MP: "ok?" (probably thinking I'm going to cut a lock of her hair off or something)
Me: "I see you all the time, and I have to tell you that you are totally adorable, and cute, and I love the way you dress. I even gave you a nickname"
MP: "oh my gosh! what's my nickname?"
Me: "Miss Pants. Cuz you prance around, in your pants, making your butt look all cute, with your cute figure and all of this......."  I did the hand motion where I pointed to her head down to her feet.

She got a kick out of this. She laughed, was flattered, and introduced herself. Her real name is not NEARLY as fitting as Miss Pants. So I will keep my pet name for her.
I told her she is my inspiration for getting back in shape and whatever she is doing.... it's definitely working.

I failed, however, to ask her what her secret was. Sacrificial lambs? Eye of newt? The blood of a virgin? Because at this point I'll try anything.

word of the day

head·ache

[hed-eyk] 

–noun
1. a pain located in the head, as over the eyes, at the temples, or at the base of the skull. I have a headache from too much wine last night, I can't go to the gym.

2.  an annoying or bothersome person, situation, activity, etc. My screaming child is such a headache, where's my wine?

3. an excuse made to get out of sex. Not tonight honey, I have a headache.

Synonyms:      annoyance, bane, bills, bother, child, dilemma, 

frustration, hassle, hindrance, husband, inconvenience, in-laws,

nuisance, pain in the neck/butt, pest,  predicament, PTA,
quagmire, trouble, vexation, worry.